Please.

"The Fear of God is the only cure for the Fear of People"  -Craig Groeschel

I am reading a book called "Weird" by Craig Groeschel and the chapter I just read was about being a people-pleaser. Something, I believe, often distracts me away from where my mindset should fall. Groeschel states that there are four "characteristic symptoms" of people-pleasers:
    
    #1. A tendency to take criticism personally.    How often have you, just like me, taken something so personally it affects what is on your mind for the rest of your day, or maybe even week? If these thoughts conquer our mind and heart for those days, what are we missing out on? What is God trying to teach us? What growing, positive thoughts could have replaced those? If those thoughts were gone how much more would we be able to positively affect those around us?
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. -Philippians 4:8
    #2. A constant fear of rejection from those around them.      Now, I would like to think that my fear is not constant, because the word "constant" conveys the feeling of an unrelenting dark cloud following me around. But, saying that, I definitely have my cloud-filled days. Those are that days that I forget who gives me my identity, the days when I forget who I am as a child of God. I forget that only what God thinks of me has value to my life...and He loves me. He loves me despite all the mistakes I make. He has called me beautiful despite what society labels as imperfections. He has loved me enough to die my death on a cross. Those are glimpses of the Son that are blocked by my clouds. (and yes, I did write that last sentence, and I loved it)
    #3 Difficulty in expressing their true feelings     Feelings, hmmm. I feel like I am pretty good at expressing my feelings, but I also know the thoughts of, "How will this person accept this information and use it" cross my mind way more than they should. Why should it matter who accepts you for who you are? *refer to above statement #2* We forget our identity in Christ. If someone doesn't like us for the feelings God has placed within our hearts, we shouldn't fret. That goes back to the whole "fear of rejection" thing. If we suffer for our feelings we need take it as a blessing. God is using those sufferings to establish, and make firm, our character within Him. He will build our character so much we will no longer fear the rejection or judgement for expressing our true feelings. We also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. -Romans 5:3-5
     #4 Reluctance to say "no" even when it's clear they should.     *Refer to above statements* What do you believe? Do you bend when a certain person asks if you want to do something you shouldn't? Do you compromise your beliefs for a moment of fun? Do you cower away from the confident word "no" when a situation arises around people you want to fit in with? Do you compromise your beliefs by the simple fact of wanting to fit in with the crowd to begin with? We can all answer yes to one of these questions from some situation in life in the past or the present day, for we are human...we are sinners.

I believe these people-pleasing attitudes take us all over at one point or another. The bigger picture paints the idea that we are looking in the wrong place for our identity as children of God. Are we looking to the world, or to the One who created the world? Who's team do we want to play on? You can't play for Ohio State and Michigan at the same time and be accepted. Why do we think we can play on the world's team while still fighting for first string on God's team? We are called to be weird in the worlds eyes. We need to learn to deal with it. We are going to be criticized, rejected, and made fun of for what we say and the choices we make. That's life. That's the world. But that's not our team.

And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?   -Mark 8:36

"The Fear of God is the only cure for the Fear of People"  -Craig Groeschel
Who do you fear more? We may be making people too big in our lives and God too small.

Let the Lord's people show him reverence, for those who honor him will have all they need. -Psalm 34:9